Day 11: Tanya

Tanya Rachelle Johns Prince

  March 16th is hands down the hardest day of the year for me and my family.  It marks another year that Tanya died. Tanya was the best cousin anyone could ask for. She was basically my older sister and helped raised me from the time I was born. Since Cort and I are the youngest grandchildren on both my mom and dad's sides, our cousins are all older than us. Tanya used to always babysit me when I was younger and I was with her all the time. As I got older things started to change and I didn't see her as much. There are so many days I wish I could go back to those days and see her again. I miss her so much. Her death was by far the hardest thing that has ever happened to me but it has made me grow so much as a person. I've grown so much closer to my family and don't take them for granted any more.
    Tanya was one of the funniest people I have ever met! She always had an adventure for my sister and I. I will never forget the time we were in her HUGE truck coming home from Justin, her sons, birthday party and it was the bumpiest ride ever! I just remember her laughing so hard and yelling about how badly her bladder hurt because she had to go to the bathroom! I remember our sleepovers, our slurpee runs, our hair-doings. There are so many times I wish I could just go hang out at her house and talk to her about school, dances, friends, life in general, and of course boys! Now that I can finally date those would be much more interesting conversations!
    Though her time with us was cut short, it was for the best. She is in a much better place and no longer in pain. I won't forget the last time I saw her and how sad it made me to see her in so much pain. At the time I was scared of her because she didn't really look like the Tanya I was familiar with. I wish I could take back that moment and go back and hug her with all my might and tell her how much I loved her. What happened was part of The Plan and I am so grateful for the gospel in my life to help myself and my family go through this difficult time.
    Tanya is my hero. Still today I admire and look up to her. I love you Tan!!!!

" I wish heaven had a phone so I could talk to you again. I thought of you today, but that is nothing new. I thought about you yesterday, and days before that too. I think of you in silence, I often speak your name. All I have are memories and a picture in a frame."